Depression - Divya Toshniwal

How to Uplift Your Spirits When You Feel Gloomy

Posted on November 11, 2022September 14, 2026 by Divya Toshniwal

Troubles are everywhere. We face issues in relationships, we face issues at work, and we face issues relating to our own physical and mental health. Even on my happiest days if I look around I find someone or the other facing some kind of issue. Right now, most people are concerned about rising prices and thus expenses. The ones who do not have to worry about their finances are helpless as they face issues in their personal relations. The ones who are lucky enough to be out of relationship mess and financial dilemmas are physically unfit or maybe just not happy with where their lives are going.

I have had many coaching clients who have just one little complaint. They are not finding their life meaningful. They say they do not know where they are going and whether they are happy doing what they are doing. This makes them sad, and although they have a life that most people would kill for, they still feel gloomy and depressed.

Though this issue is deep-seated and needs personally customized plans for every individual here I want to address a general problem and unique solutions to it.

The question that I want to address today is simple.

How to uplift your spirits when you are sad.

If the reason behind your sadness is external circumstances and is out of your control:

In situations where everything is out of your control, it becomes tougher to let it go and uplift your spirits. But the most important point to remember here is that there is actually nothing you can do to change the circumstances. You are unhappy about people dying but you cannot stop the war between the 2 countries. You don’t like government policies but it is not in your hands alone to change the government. You don’t like the way a certain person behaves but you cannot change their behavior. You don’t like that your boss prefers your colleague over you but you cannot change their behavior. You do not like your job but that is what keeps your family going so you can’t quit. All you can do is change the way you react to things and make things easier for yourself.

Sleep for some time. It might sound like a silly suggestion to start with but it works wonders. When there is something that is disturbing you and you can do nothing about it sleeping for some time can give your brain the relaxation it has been craving from all that overthinking. When you wake up you will feel a little better.
Cry if you need to. There have been many pieces of research on why people feel better after crying and what it reveals is crying releases oxytocin and endorphins. These happiness hormones help deal better with both emotional and physical pain.
Schedule meetings with people you like. Meet them and divert your attention to things that make you feel better.
Do something for someone else. Evolution has wired us to help each other. Our bodies are structured in such a way that when we give to others or help others it helps release happiness hormones like oxytocin and reduces cortisol (stress hormones). Read more here.
Listen to Music. Research has shown that listening to music can reduce anxiety, stress, blood pressure and in fact also relieve you from pain (both mental and physical). It improves your mood.
Have a Gratitude Jar. This will need a little preparation but can work wonders when you are sad. Whenever something good happens to you make a note of it, fold the paper and put it in a jar. The next time when you are upset pick out random chits and start reading them. You can also do it with a gratitude journal.
Go for walks. Being close to nature and working out both can help you curb your stress hormones and thus going for a walk becomes the most desirable option.

If the reason for your sadness is internal and you can make some changes to feel better:

For times when there is something that you can do about the situation and bring about a change here are the things that you can do to uplift your spirits.

Focus on facts. Many a times we overthink and make things worse for ourselves. In order to uplift your mood the first step you need to do is stop overthinking and focus on reality.
Create an action plan. Once you can stop your overthinking the next step is to take action.For example, if you do not love your job and you are not being able to make the switch because of financial responsibilities, then start working on making a shift. Learn how to reduce you expenses. Try to find things you love and how you can make a career in them. Follow the HEART model for setting goals. Initially just use your spare time and weekends to work on it and then you can make a permanent switch when it is possible. No matter what the issue, even creating an action plan to bring about the change can uplift your spirits.
Talk about it. Talk to people about it and not with the ones who will make you further gloomy. Have a set of solution-oriented people. The ones who can actually give you some great suggestions for working on your current situation.
Work on improving your mental health. Check your belief system, and work on strengthening it. Create your own calm and work on things that make you anxious. Connect with a professional who can help you identify why you are feeling a certain way and what changes you can bring in your life to make you feel good about it. Spend time with yourself and for yourself. Indulge in self-care.
Learn to say no. There may be times when you overburden yourself just to please others. Work on saying no and being able to live with the fact that you cannot make everybody happy all the time.

Self-Care Habits To Help You Deal With Depression

Posted on December 3, 2021September 14, 2026 by Divya Toshniwal

What Is Depression?

Depression can mean something different for each individual and hence to define depression is not the right thing to do. As for the meaning of the word depression, Google says: “a feeling of unhappiness that lasts for a long time. Depression can be a medical condition and may have physical signs, for example being unable to sleep, etc.”

Different symptoms are reported in depression, all of which may not be present at all times for all people. But some symptoms would definitely be present. You can learn to identify the Symptoms of Depression.

What Is Self-Care?

To make yourself a priority. While in depression the worst thing we do is avoid our own well-being. We do not pay attention to our physical or mental health because our emotions are not in balance. The lack of energy and interest makes us avoid the most important thing in life- Ourselves. When I went into depression I realized I did all the stuff that I could for people around me. I smiled for other people in my life, I tried hiding my emotions, my true self. I did all the work that was needed to be done but after that, I had no energy left. I had no energy left for myself.

Later, a few things in my life made me realize the importance of me. I understood the importance of self-love and self-care. one of the greatest changes in my life was brought by dance and movement therapy. I took a Diploma course on Dance and movement therapy that helped me overcome my depression to a great extent.

I understood that taking care of yourself is not selfish, I understood that it’s ok to think about yourself, and I understood that I can take care of my loved ones only when I am alright. If I am weak, physically, mentally, or emotionally it will take a toll on all aspects of my life and the people associated with me. I researched more and read more about self-care and I understood that self-care is not expensive and is not a luxury that normal people cannot afford. We can practice self-care every day.

But while suffering through a depressive episode, the daily self-care is sometimes not enough. Daily self-care acts as a maintenance dose but right now you need to put some extra effort to help you deal with depression.

Self-Care Habits That Can Help To Fight Depression

When it comes to self-care for depression not everything and anything will work for you. The reason for depressive episodes can be varied and hence the way you can overcome your depression also might vary from another person whom you have seen coming out of depression. All I am saying is what worked for them might not work for you. Hence I am trying to list down a few options for self-care that help in overcoming depression and you can try them to understand what works for you the best.

Develop an exercise routine. This is not an option. No matter what the reason of your depression is, you need to get up from the bed and move your body( unless you have a severe physical ailment) . There should be at least 30 – 40 minutes in your day where you do some form of physical activity and your heartbeat goes up. The choice of workout, however, is entirely your choice. For me , aerobics and dancing works the best. I also love to go out on walks in parks. Being close to nature is another thing that makes me happy.
Continuing on my previous point of being close to nature, another aspect of self-care is also taking small little breaks from your monotonous life and going on small vacations also help to overcome depression.
Practice Positive Affirmation. Create positive affirmations for yourself, anything that suits you and relates to your life. Repeating the positive affirmations would help you design an optimistic mindset. And here by optimistic mindset I don’t mean wishful thinking. It is just being able to accept the possibility of something very positive happening in your life. Mindset would make it reality.
If the reason for your depression is loneliness and not having enough people around, then social self-care is something that becomes of utmost importance. It is not always the case that we are alone. Sometimes we shut everyone out so hard that we end up creating that loneliness for ourselves. So, the next time someone calls you, don’t avoid talking and reply to messages. The next time someone invites you for a meetup or a gathering say YES. Commit to one social meetup each week . If there is not invite from others then go ahead and invite someone on your own. For times when going out is not possible take help of video calls.
If the reason for your depression is financial then start now to build some economic stability for yourself. It is never too late and the situation you are in can be changed. Nothing will change overnight but trust me when I say things will change. Learn how financial self-care is important and how you can build the economic stability you want.
If the reason of your depression is not feeling loved enough or losing a romantic partner then PLEASE start loving yourself again. We often indulge in our relationships so much that we stop loving ourselves and that is what leads to being sad and lonely (whether you are in a relationship or broken apart). Love Yourself First. It is not being Selfish.
Spend some time in knowing yourself better. One of the greatest ways to do that is through journaling. Get some journal prompts for self-awareness, get a journal, and depending on how creative you are, some stationery. Find some time every day to come closer to yourself. Do not edit or re-edit your words. Just write in a flow.
Dedicate some time to developing your spiritual practice. The form may be anything that helps you . For me meditation and reading good books help the most. If you believe in energy healing or practice do that. If you believe in crystals then use their power . But by getting into such healing I don’t mean that go to a healer pay them a handsome amount and get healed . I would suggest , learn these things for yourself. Start with a book , get into a course and understand the very basic of healing yourself .
Soothe all your five senses. Organize your space so that you live in a clutter-free home and office . The aesthetics of your home and office help a lot to reduce stress. What you look at the entire day is an essential part of your life. Listen to good music , it will help you relax better. Eat the food you love and soothe your taste buds . But do not forget to eat healthy too as what you eat becomes very important in dealing with depression. Massage your feet and hands. If need be go get a full body massage to relax and make you feel pampered and last but not the least your olfactory senses may help a great deal. That is why aroma therapy is getting so popular nowadays. Go get some good fragrances in form of a candle or diffuser and it will make you feel good.
Practice mindfulness. Be in the present moment as much as you can. Thinking about the past and worrying about the future is going to contribute only to overthinking. Hence practice mindfulness exercises and help your mind stay in now and here.

Ways to Self-care are many but the basic philosophy behind it is that you are your longest commitment and your relationship with anyone or anything can never be above your relationship with yourself.

Above all this, I would always suggest that there is no harm in asking for help. If you are feeling depressed and are not being able to handle things on your own then seek help from the people around you and if need be, seek professional help. You can connect with me here to book an online counseling session.

Depression: Identifying The Hidden Epidemic : Symptoms of Depression and How To Self-Heal

Posted on November 27, 2021November 19, 2022 by Divya Toshniwal

While the world was busy fighting the pandemic it was engulfed in, there started a secret war – A fight with self. We lost a lot during the pandemic. We were able to recover from some losses but some were not recoverable. We lost our loved ones, our jobs, and our lifestyle, and our physical and mental health deteriorated too. Though all of us became very alert about maintaining better physical health and became active in eating healthy and creating a healthy lifestyle, not many paid attention to the hidden epidemic that was crawling up our mental space.

We were closed in our homes for a very long time. Though the introverts thought it to be a boon for some time when it extended to such a long duration it started bothering them too. Being isolated for such a long time and not being able to meet people has taken a toll on the mental health of many people. The sense of belongingness has reduced causing people to think they are all alone in this world. With the joint family structures breaking into nuclear families this problem has further escalated.

Staying at home we tried to make the most of our time in the beginning but the enthusiasm kind of went down after a couple of months. There was a shoot in the non-productive hours which kept us behind on our goals. It eventually started creating a feeling of worthlessness. The inability to do things as planned reduced our enthusiasm day after day.

People have been confused and not able to identify the emotions they are going through. Now when life is getting back to normal, they do not know whether they are happy about it or not.

Identify depression: Symptoms Of Depression You Should Look Out For

Even when things are open now, you don’t feel like going out and want to stay in the entire day.
A constant feeling of loneliness exists and you do not have people to connect to, nor do you want to connect to people.
The feeling of depression and a constant sad mood has been prevailing for more that 2 weeks.
Your entire sleep pattern has been disturbed and you do not get any sound sleep.
The ability to work and concentrate is reduced.
You have a disturbed decision-making ability.
Your appetite has changed and you notice a significant change in your body weight( either increased or decreased)
You feel lethargic the entire day. You do not feel like getting up the bed or take any kind of initiative.
There is a feeling of worthlessness and guilt of not being able to do anything
You do not feel any interest in activities that previously gave you pleasure.
At times you feel that life is not worth living.

If you feel that more than 50% of the symptoms listed above are applicable to you, then it is high time you start paying attention to your mental health and seek professional help.

How to deal with depression on your own?

If you feel you can turn your life around without professional help and that you can deal with your depression on your own, congratulations!! you have won half the war. To help you in your journey I have made a list of changes you can easily bring about in your life to beat depression and boost your mental health.

It is extremely important for you to make your body physically active. Even when you do not feel like doing so you have to push yourself a little and activate your body. For at least 30 minutes a day, your heartbeat should be running fast and your body should sweat.
Eat fresh fruit and salads. Make it a part of at least one of your meals. What you eat is what you become and even diet plays a huge role in overcoming depression.
Understand that Self-Care is not selfish and practice it daily. Read more about Self-Care for depression
Even if you stay at home all day, create a constructive routine for yourself. Have your day scheduled. Do not disrupt your routine. For example, have time scheduled for bathing in the morning, have your meals scheduled, and also your chores and other work.
Improve Your Sleep Patterns. Better sleep means the mind gets more time to heal itself. Our body and mind heals the best when we are asleep. So give yourself time to self-heal by improving your sleep patterns.
Take walks in nature. Go for a morning walk in a park , spend time with nature. If possible take a vacation and go someplace where you can be close to nature .
Limit your screen time. When nothing seems to work out and we feel sad or depressed we have a tendency to spend out time in front of the TV or binge-watching some series or movies. It keeps our dopamine levels up and makes us feel a bit better. But as soon as we put the screens off it makes us feel worse about ourselves making the depression even worse than before.
Try to spend some time with people. Be aware of energy vampires and choose wisely the people your spend your time with.
Meditation is a very good option to create a bond with yourself, to understand what is going on in your mind and to decide in which direction you want to take your thoughts. Below I am adding the link to my favorite meditation musics.

A lot of other things can be done in order to deal with depression without third-party support, and in many cases, it is possible to overcome depression without medications and professional support. You need to be more aware of your situation and develop emotional intelligence. It will help you in all sections of your life.

Tag: Depression